i can’t breathe

I felt sick as I watched the video of George Floyd murdered by a Minneapolis Police Officer who dug his knee into George’s neck as he begged for oxygen. As he continuously cried out the words “Please I can’t breathe. My stomach hurts. My neck hurts. Everything hurts. They’re going to kill me.” All for what? An alleged non-violent felony.

My heart sank as I read through comments of people who claim that this, along with the murder of people like Ahmaud Arbery and Eric Gardner is “leftist propaganda to encourage division.” While I am not denying that people use racism as political leverage, it seems as though people are more concerned with validating their own presuppositions and bias and remaining ignorant of the problem than speaking up and demanding justice for the black community. They are more concerned with politicizing compassion and racism, rather than making an effort to listen to the people who are actually affected by this regularly, who have lost people they love to the brutality of police.

Here it is, racial profiling of innocent black men, the tragic murder of black men, and yet people still default to their privilege, people still dwell in the comfort of the fact that they are privileged enough to not have to process or wrestle with these tragic events.

The purpose of me writing this is not to debate motives, or assume an overt racist attitude. But to grieve, to reflect on this cultural reality, this tragic evil that African Americans must deal with, that they have historically dealt with, and to uproot and bring to light the implicit or unconscious bias that we all possess (yes even YOU). I wrestled with the idea of writing about this, I didn’t want to be too blunt or too harsh or offend people. But I realize that taking a proactive step in raising my voice is being a part of the solution.

I don’t want to use this as a platform to deflect any accusations that I am ignorant. I don’t want to use this to seek personal relevancy or recognition, and I don’t feel the liberty to start offering solutions as if I am an expert.

This is me saying I hear you. My heart breaks with you. I want to help. I’m here to grieve with you. I am hear to raise my voice for justice.

Micah 6:8, Isaiah 58:6–11